Next time you hear somebody snootily refer to a 'diseasel' or some other derogatory comment regarding cars that drink from the black pump, be sure of one thing. The person on transmit-only has clearly never driven a BMW 335d and thus is operating from a position of conspicuous ignorance. For all but the most unreconstructed petrolhead, this car has the ability to drop your jaw.

Yes, we've had quick BMW diesels before but nothing quite like this. The old E46 series 330d was quite the tool but the 335d represents not just an incremental step forward in terms of performance and power delivery, but a vast leap that's at first difficult to mentally process. Available in saloon, touring and coupe variants, it's not cheap but it nevertheless makes a very compelling value proposition. Put simply, it steamrollers anything impudent enough to call itself opposition.

Imagine a genuinely quick car, maybe a leading sports coupe. Let's take a Nissan 350Z or an Audi TT 3.2 quattro. They're both extremely quick and capable cars that are about as good to drive as you could seriously ask for. Neither would be able to drive away from BMW 335d. All three have similar times for the sprint to 60mph and all three will top out at 155mph. The difference between these cars is that where the Nissan will seat two and the Audi two adults and two human torsos, the 335d saloon will comfortably seat four normal-sized homo sapiens.

In other words, you're buying all the capability with none of the caveats. While the Nissan would major on he-man drama and the Audi shout look at me, the BMW just gets on with the job with no fuss. I don't know whether I've ever driven any other car that made going so fast seem so slow, the sure sign of a very talented chassis. Ride quality very much depends on whether you choose the SE or M Sport trim levels but even the sportier suspension pack isn't notably harsh. BMW's excellent DTC stability control system and a six-speed auto box keeps that 286bhp and 580Nm of torque in check. In case you were wondering, that's more torque than a Ferrari F430.

"Engine technology doesn't get a lot more impressive than this"

The 335d saloon features many of the contemporary BMW styling signatures, albeit in a more conservative guise than BMW models that immediately preceded it. The sill line is bowed, although nowhere near as radically as in, say, a 1-series. Compare how the rear bootlid is a chamfered and smoothed version of that worn by the 5-Series. Even the flanks betray a less aggressive concave contouring, while the rest of the traditional BMW cues such as the 'Hofmeister Kink' at the rear window and the kidney grille are present and correct. Although it's not what you'd call a striking piece of design, it is mature and assured.

The practical advantages of the 335d Touring over its saloon counterpart only really make themselves felt when there are less than four people in the car. You get a 460-litre void back there to fill with the paraphernalia of your choice and that doesn't compare at all favourably with the 460-litres you get in the saloon for £1,170 less. Fold the rear seats down, however, and the available space mushrooms up to 1,385 litres. Some will contend also that the Touring has stealthier Q-car qualities.

The key issue the 335d faces is that it's a range-topper and must therefore work a little harder to leverage a quality feel. That might sound a little odd but it's far easier for the base model 318i to feel a class removed from its similarly priced brethren than a car which costs at least £33,610 in its most affordable form. Get customers out for a test drive in this model and they'll see the point straight away. Otherwise, the 335d could be a trickier sell than you might at first think.

Both the saloon and the Touring are offered in SE and M Sport guises with prices pitched at £33,610 and £36,350 respectively for the saloon or £1,180 more for the Touring equivalents. Is the 335d worth over £3,000 more, model for model, over the already very impressive 330d? I'd say so. That last ten per cent of cost is the difference between a very good car and a great one.

SE trim we're relatively accustomed to, offering as it does a well-equipped but slightly softer riding package than the sportier versions. M Sport features an M Aerodynamic body kit, M Sports suspension, high-gloss shadow line detailing, an M Sports steering wheel, sports seats, an M gear knob, M Sports door sill kick plates, M interior trim and an anthracite headlining. That's quite enough branding for one paragraph.

Once you've swallowed the pill that is the 335d's hefty upfront price, ongoing running costs are reasonable. Service intervals are managed by the dynamic onboard diagnostics system and although the BMW warranty isn't as overgenerous as it once was, it's still one of the best in the business.

Fuel bills probably won't send you to the wall, the 335d saloon averaging over 42mpg with 48mpg easily attainable on a motorway journey. The EfficientDynamics package on the latest car introduced features like Brake Energy Regeneration and Auto Start-Stop which have had a dramatic effect on overall efficiency. BMW's 'swingometer' instant fuel consumption gauge also gently reminds you when you're getting a bit excited with the right boot. You'll soon learn to manage acceleration without troubling the larger of the two turbochargers; the key to achieving economy in this car.

Depreciation is manageable, the 335d retaining around 48 per cent of its value after three years. If this seems a little soft, it's an inevitable consequence of being a range-topping car. For reference purposes, a Mercedes C320CDI will retain around 42 per cent. Insurance is Group 18 which isn't entirely unreasonable given that this is a very quick, very desirable, rear-wheel drive German prestige car. It's about what you'd pay for an Audi TT 3.2 quattro or a Nissan 350Z, equivalently quick and similarly expensive cars.

Although well over £30,000 might sound a lot to spend on a BMW 3 Series that doesn't have an M3 badge on its rear end, the 335d is a car that carries its price tag lightly. The phenomenal engine offers more power than a Nissan Skyline GT-R but better economy than a 1.8-litre Ford Mondeo. You can be coming back from IKEA in the Touring estate safe in the knowledge that your car will demolish a Porsche 911 Carrera from 50-70mph, yet is emitting less carbon dioxide per kilometre travelled than a Hyundai Coupe 2.0. Forget the Toyota Prius - engine technology doesn't get a lot more impressive than this.

The rest of the package isn't bad either. The entry-level SE models are, if anything, even more appealing than the try-hard M-Sport variants and the Touring is cooler again. Only the lack of a manual gearbox might deter real hotshoes.

TOP 5 3 SERIES DEALS

The results below show the top 3 SERIES deals on buyacar

	BMW 3 Series 335d M Sport 4dr Auto Saloon
	ETR	Mthly	Saving £2,382	Price £34,073
	BMW 3 Series 335d SE 2dr Auto Coupe
	ETR	Mthly	Saving £574	Price £35,691
	BMW 3 Series 335d SE 5dr Auto Touring Estate
	ETR	Mthly	Saving £2,240	Price £32,655
	BMW 3 Series 335d SE 4dr Auto Saloon
	ETR	Mthly	Saving £2,132	Price £31,583
	BMW 3 Series 335d M Sport 5dr Auto Touring Estate
	ETR	Mthly	Saving £2,489	Price £35,146